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Cultural Barriers
All day Saturday I spent the day washing and braiding my children's hair. “Hair Wash Day” is an African American ritual that is depicted in Egyptian drawings dating back to 2050 B.C. Moms, Aunties, and Sisters spend the day washing and styling their children's hair or...

Othered
Mama. That is the name I most dreamed of being called. I’d sit in libraries and bookstores with my friends in high school and flip through Anne Geddes books dreaming of a squishy baby of my own. When I was dating my now husband in college, I was very clear to him that...

The Lonely Path of Placing My Daughter for Adoption: Feeling “Othered”
Motherhood is often portrayed as a joyous and fulfilling experience, but the journey of motherhood is not always straightforward. For some women, the difficult decision to place their child for adoption can lead to a profound sense of "otherness" that permeates...

Freedom From Expectations As An Adoptee Victoria Tucker Tier 3
One of the biggest obstacles to overcome on any side of the adoption triad is letting go of expectations. When an adoption is new, everyone expects their expectations to be met. But life happens and when it does, expectations can be unmet. Expectations as an adoptee...

You Can Find Freedom In Open Adoption As An Adoptive Parent
The Thomas Jefferson School of law defines freedom as, “The state of being aware of one’s own place in the world, taking responsibility for it, and deciding for one’s self how best to act: striving for authenticity.” As an adoptive parent, striving for authenticity...

Freedom From Shame
They say, “Shame dies when stories are told in safe places.” While that might be true, I believe that shame is conquered when stories are shared in places that might not be safe. When I used to share my story, I was selective over who was privy to that information. My...

How Adoptees Wrestle With Nature Vs. Nurture
As an adoptee, I have always been fascinated with the debate between Nature vs. Nurture. It is a topic of discussion that has been around for decades. Yet there is not one single answer. Depending on the circumstances and the individuals involved, the pendulum can...