Love Endures All Things
Love is resilient. It doesn’t abandon or fade when things get difficult. Love stays through identity struggles, through reunions or separations, through seasons of doubt and discovery. Love endures, holding space for growth and acceptance.
When thinking about love enduring all, it requires acknowledging both the beauty and the complexity of adoption. Love is not just about the placement or the legal process. Love is about ongoing commitment and understanding.
I have said it before, and I will repeat it: I do not believe God intended for children to be separated from their birth family. We live in an imperfect and broken world, and children are often most affected by the brokenness. When a birth family cannot parent their child, adoption becomes an option. This option gave me a safe and loving family and a better life. This option gave me opportunities that a little kid from the ghettos of Haiti can only dream about. On the flip side, this option took my mother and father away. It took my birth culture, birth language, siblings, cousins, identity, music, food, friends, and so much more. This option gave as much as it took.
Love Bears All Things
Adoptees may carry deep emotions that others might not fully understand. Love bears the weight of these feelings and does not dismiss them. Love offers a safe place to process these feelings. Whether it’s grief, confusion, or longing, love does not run from pain; it walks alongside it, offering comfort and strength.
Is it a win if there is a loss?
When a birth mother decides to not go through with the adoption plan, is it a loss or is it a gain? Is it a loss or gain when hopeful adoptive parents receive the news that the baby they had prayed for will no longer be a part of their family? Is this a failed adoption or is it divine intervention? My relationship with adoption is complex and incomplete. However, my relationship with the Most High is true and complete. I have way more questions than I do answers, but I find comfort in the goodness of God.
Love Hopes All Things
Hope is a powerful force, especially for adoptees navigating their identity. Love chooses to hope, even with unanswered questions or challenging circumstances. Hope reminds us that our stories are still unfolding and that healing, connection, and understanding are always possible.
Key Takeaways:
Adoption can bring a mix of joy, grief, confusion, and identity exploration. Love endures when it doesn’t demand that an adoptee feel only gratitude but instead welcomes both the pain and the love.
- Love is Rooted in Understanding, Not Assumption
It might be easy to assume what’s “best” for an adoptee, but real love listens and asks questions. Love endures when it embraces an adoptee’s evolving identity and allows them to shape their own story.
- Love is Willing to Grow
Families, birth parents, and adoptees all grow at different paces. Love endures when people are willing to keep learning about adoption complexities, racial identity, and the lifelong impact of being adopted.
- Love is Present, Even When It’s Hard
Some adoptees struggle with feelings of rejection, loss, or disconnection. Enduring love isn’t just there in happy moments. Love shows up when adoptees pull away or when they ask tough questions. Love actively and intentionally challenges the narratives.
- Love Respects Boundaries
Enduring love isn’t about forcing connection; it’s about respecting the adoptee’s needs, whether that means more space, a search for birth family, or the ability to define relationships in their own way.
- Love Stands the Test of Time
The adoptee journey is lifelong. Love endures when it remains steady and available, even as adoptees navigate different seasons of life.
At its core, enduring love in adoption is about presence, patience, and acceptance. It’s a love that acknowledges the full truth of adoption—not just the happy parts—but chooses to remain, no matter what.