Bunmi Laditan is one of my favorite Authors. She is a poet, author, mom, and realist. She has a way of knitting words together that is equivalent to knitting wounds together. I am convinced that her words are blessed from God.
Her poem is a declaration of love. I am left feeling warm and reassured that I was always loved and wanted.
Bunmi Laditan
“You were not born of my body
but from the depths of my heart
my little seedling
planted in the soft earth of my soul
I do not need to own your tangled roots
to water them
no matter what storms may pass
I will be your sun singing warm melodies as you grow
green skin against the pale blue and white tomorrow
How blessed I am to have this flower in my garden”
Inserts from Wanted Poem: Written by Myrlene Mondesir
I have never been one for fairytales,
but time, and time again, I dance with the idea of always being loved.
This illusion; this desire of always being loved is just a fleeting thought
The need to be loved is in our DNA.
From the moment we breathe,
We need to be held, to be touched, to be loved…to be wanted.
I have never been one for fairytales
but time, and time again, I dance with the idea of always being loved.
In my younger years, my soul yearned to be loved.
So, I chased metaphors of love, but never finding love itself
I have always been critical and unforgiving of myself
Because even in my brightest moments, I feel undeserving of love.
I am just a beautifully battered soul
dancing with the idea of always being loved.
I wrote this poem almost 15 years ago, on Mother’s Day, right when I was on the cusp of my healing journey. I was broken and yearning for the mother I never got to know. At the same time, I felt immense guilt for missing a woman I never knew when I had a wonderful mother next to me. Guilt and shame can be so overwhelming, and I want to encourage all adoptees to embrace all the hard and intricate emotions that come with being adopted.
Unknown
Not flesh of my flesh
Not bone of my bone. But still miraculously my own.
And never forget for a minute.
You were not born under my heart.
You were born in my heart.
Not Enough Words: A birth mom poem written by an Adoptions of Wisconsin birth mom
My heart stopped the first time I heard yours beat,
You have no clue my love, how many struggles we over came
It was a great feat.
You gave me courage and hope when I had none,
Everything that I can claim,
You helped me overcome!
At night I’d sing to you and you’d sing back,
The prayers I couldn’t pray,
You held the faith that I lacked.
Maybe you were my Guardian Angel, my Shepherd through the dark and the pain,
I don’t think I’ll ever lose you,
Inside of me you’ll always remain.
I may not get to see you grow or see your first step,
I may not come to birthdays or be there when you’re upset,
However, my heart and mind and spirit will be with you every single day
Just like I was guiding you in every single way.
The hardest thing I ever did was having to give you away
And the second hardest thing was not being able to tell you all I had to say.
I will always love you.
Mother’s Day is what you make of it.
It is okay to shower your mom (s) with love and affection.
It is okay to want to be alone.
It is okay to nurture your inner child.
It is okay to do nothing and feel nothing.
What is not okay is to take on the weight of the world’s expectations for you.