National Adoption Awareness Month is About No Shame

National Adoption Awareness Month is About No Shame

Every year on October 31, my brother shaves his face and embarks on a horrible journey to not shave for the entire month of November. It’s part of a great movement called “No Shave November” or, ”Movember” as a man of both Latino and Middle-Eastern descent, the...

Survivors Guilt in Adoption: How Can I Overcome It?

Survivors Guilt in Adoption: How Can I Overcome It?

It is Friday night and I am relaxing on the couch with my children and husband watching another episode of Family Matters. Dinner has already been served, and we are well on our way to warm chocolate chip cookies and vanilla ice cream for dessert. My heart is full and...

Ridding Yourself of Shame About Being A Birth Mother

Ridding Yourself of Shame About Being A Birth Mother

“Shame hates when we reach out tell our story. It hates having words wrapped around it – it can’t survive being shared. Shame loves secrecy. When we bury our story, the shame metastasizes.” – Brene Brown   When I think of shame, I think of: Secrecy Desperation...

What’s Behind the Metaphorical Mask of an Adoptee?

What’s Behind the Metaphorical Mask of an Adoptee?

Behind the Mask   I am not enough I am too much I am not smart enough I am a know it all I am too loud I am too soft I am pushover I am a bulldozer I care too much about what people think of me I am too honest I am not honest enough I am bad mother I am a bad...

Why Adoptive Parents Need to Lose the Mask of Perfection

Why Adoptive Parents Need to Lose the Mask of Perfection

One of the most impactful books I’ve ever read is John Lynch’s book, The Cure. In it, he shares the importance of authenticity and taking off the mask of who we portray ourselves to be our true self. You see, we all are guilty in some way of wearing a mask in our...

The Importance of Adoptee Identity

The Importance of Adoptee Identity

Our own Ieisha Burrows from Abiding Love Adoption Agency shares her observations about what it was like to be an adoptee from foster care and what she would like prospective adoptive parents and adoptive parents to know about adoptee identity and how important it was...

Adoption Education Never Ends For The Adoptive Family

Adoption Education Never Ends For The Adoptive Family

It wasn’t too long ago we were all blasting Alice Cooper’s School’s Out as we drove away from the last day of school. Big plans for summertime adventures and family bonding took over our calendars and minds. School is necessary (private, public, homeschool, etc.) but...

A Birth Mother Goes Back To Basics About Adoption Plans

A Birth Mother Goes Back To Basics About Adoption Plans

When I found out I was unexpectedly pregnant, I had no clue where to turn. I was so overwhelmed with my new reality and struggled to figure out what to do next. I remember the adoption agency told me everything they wanted me to know, but now that I’ve gained more...

Cultural Barriers

Cultural Barriers

All day Saturday I spent the day washing and braiding my children's hair. “Hair Wash Day” is an African American ritual that is depicted in Egyptian drawings dating back to 2050 B.C. Moms, Aunties, and Sisters spend the day washing and styling their children's hair or...